I don't have to give an intro to my post, the heading says it all. *you can skip the following lines in this paragraph if you wish to. If you and I were to look through my blog archives, it's of no doubt that posts on exams comprises of at least 80% of my blog posts. Exams have always been my apple of discord, almost the main cause of surge of adrenaline in my body. It not only gets me worrying about the high expectations people set on me, but also about whether or not I will be able to ace every [damn] subject. I wish though, I took things a little easier and to not fret or frown over small disappointments. I guess the only solution to curbing despondency due to exams is to not set superfluous goals myself, because whenever I fail to satiate these hard-to-attain goals, it is then I am drenched in weariness.
Alright, I don't want to write my whole retrospect on exams, I'll just get straight to the point. I've just sat for my second semester exam. Results are of course, almost certainly not out yet, especially with teachers who slack when it comes to marking -_-. I was especially stressed to the brim of my anxiety level for this exam because I was told of the exam at the eleventh hour. I was told initially that I, together with 39 other students, 40 in all would not be sitting for this exam as we are supposed to garner up much effort in practice for Merdeka Day (read my previous entry and you'll know what the merdeka thingy is all about). But to our chagrin and also much to our expectation, the dates set for the practice in the schedule which we were so grateful for synchronization with the exam days, were delayed. And,at the risk of sounding mundane, we had to sit for the exam. sigh, sigh, sigh, sigh, much sighs...
There's more to the thrill I had for this exam, something I had experienced not in all the other exams. Alright, I have this Pendidikan Moral in my syllabus and it's one of the 5 matapelajaran teras (main subject) for me, not an elective in which I can ditch. And there's this long list of moral values together with their definition and key words given to us, moral students (how contradicting). We would have to memorize the whole thing for exams, yes the whole damn thing. Had I been informed of this exam earlier, I would have memorized it and yadayadayada. But the problem was, I had not time for this stupid thing and had to focus a lot more on subjects worth determination, like Physics, Additional Mathematics, Biology and Chemistry. So, yeah, I had to play compromising. I did not memorize that long-list of moral values and all of its contents. The scheming plan we planned out was to copy the list. How? Slip it into our pencil case, and staple it behind our test paper so as to not make it obvious that we're copying.
The plan seemed to have gone really good at first. We thrived jubilantly in our minds as we got the easy way out. We cheated stress and anxiety. But just then, a big melodrama unfolded in the class. The invigilator, who was apparently my class teacher, and also a former Pendidikan Moral subject teacher, had suspicion dominate her mind. Her conscience seemed to have get the hold of her. She then followed her conscience and... she came walking about the class..to pull that very important list of moral values! Oh my God, this can't be happening.. I mused to myself silently, hopelessly when her approach was near and imminent to me. I thought, this is it, my hard-built reputation among my peers, teachers, and also the principal and all the other big shots in my school, it's gonna go down the drain.
My heart was throbbing so fast I hardly noticed my breathing. The invigilator came silently and calmly, (rather slyly) from the back. By the time I realised her act, it was to late for me to do some 'swift thing' like nonchalantly tearing of the paper and squashing it silently and conceal it with palms and fingers. Ergo, I just sat still, fidgeting a little to the left and right at intervals. Then came the time I awaited silently and hoplessly to be a brusque one. She opened the first two pages of my test paper at the corners while I sat ashened in fear, still, like I was part of a child's play, the AEIOU game. Then, guess what? I escaped! How did I possibly escape? Well my list-of-moral-values paper was apparently and thankfully and luckily short, so the invigilator missed the corner of the list...phewwww, I left out a big sigh of relief, somewhat only audible to my ears, I reckon. My sister, I and 4 others, out of 17 others, were the only few to have escaped this thing....each with different stories to tell. I happened to have tore a strip of paper with considerable width and length off my list, my sister and the other Indian girl used the same tactic, tearing the list and squashing it soundly. The other guy happened to have gone to the washroom, taking his list along, at the time of the incident while the other guy, having sat right at the corner of the classroom, knew of it earlier and hid his list under the drawer of his table which was facing the front of the classroom.
Much to our suprise, the news spread like wildfire, reaching to the ears of every potent gossipers. The next day, PK Kurikulum busted in and wanted to 'recognize' the 'convicts'. My Moral subject teacher then decided to do something brutal. She would halve the total marks of the 'convicts'. That would mean a lot of D's and E's and many more incomprehendable marks. I feel bad, so guilty. My 'convicted' friends had to face all that sort of stuff while the ones who had escaped, were still at loose. But no matter how bad I feel about this thing, I just cannot bring myself to tell em' the truth. Definitely!